Entry 1 Part 1
Stardate 01082008
I remember as a child my grandparents always seemed to be yelling at each other and I always wondered why they would bicker so much. I thought for sure they would get divorced but they are together to this day. How could that be?
{mosimage} I have realized that Scott and I apparently do the same thing and do not even realize it. We were on vacation in Sedona and we were driving somewhere and Scott's mom was with us. Scott and I were bantering back and forth and mom said why are you guys fighting? Scott and I looked at each other and said we are not fighting.
Looking at us from someone elses eyes Scott and I had become my grandparents. So how is it that people can appear to be fighting yet not be? It about your communication style. For us these direct, sometimes cutting, sometimes loud interactions are just the way that we clear the air. We tend to 'bicker' and then within seconds we are laughing about something. It's hard for the outside observer to keep up.
So is this dynamic healthy or not? When I was young I thought not but now I believe that it is. Our communication style evolved through the beginning of our relationship. I had a tendancy to "STUFF" my feelings while Scott on the other hand was direct and clear. I had stress. Scott did not. Why? I would eventually violently erupt and spew out every issue I had for the last three months and it was usually over something minor. Scott never did. I was Pompei and Scott was Old Faithfull. Like the guyser Scott would gently release with no great harm dome. With me I would take down everything in a 50 mile radius.
Which do you believe is a better style?
Next Time
Communication Rules: Why they are important and some basics.
Signing Off
BJ
