Time Capsule

Early on in our relationship, Brian & I decided we needed to create a ritual to celebrate our commitment as well as be a role model for others.

Role model was not the word we used at the time. We wanted to let others know two men could have a loving, committed, monogamous relationship. We used the word "prove". 

We also wanted others to celebrate our commitment with us.

Trouble is, there are not the support structures / public rituals in place for gay couples like there are for straight couples.

We didn't want to do some knock-off or impression act either.

What to do?

After some consideration and discussion we decided upon a Time Capsule. We would create a Time Capsule every ten years. Then for our 50th Anniversary, we would have a big party to crack open the first four and build the fifth. Core to each Time Capsule would be letters from people currently in our lives. 

Notice its not letters from friends that we are seeking to include in the Time Capsule. Not that we don't want letters from friends - we do. But we decided we would not seek out long lost friends for letters. We wanted each Time Capsule to be a reflection of our lives at the time each Time Capsule was created.

It was the perfect solution. First it created a way for people in our lives to celebrate our commitment as a gay couple. They wouldn't need to remember. They would be reminded when we asked for a Time Capsule letter.

Second it created a way for us to educate our world about our relationship. How awkward is it to go up to someone and say, "I've been in a gay relationship for 20 years, would you like to congratulate and celebrate with me -- where's my card?" How much easier is it to say, "We are building a Time Capsule and I was wondering if you'd like to write a letter." They will inevitably ask, "Why are you assembling a Time Capsule?" and the conversion naturally flows and opens up.

Third the process intrigued people and brought them together around the topic of gay relationships -- particularly when they heard our plan to have a big party for our 50th Anniversary to crack open the first four Time Capsules and build the fifth.

A gay couple? Together for 50 years?

You bet!

Gay Life in Rural Vermont

So here we are in rural Vermont.  Giving advice to everyone and their brother about gay relationships.  

Many gay people who shudder at the thought of living so remotely:  45 minutes to the nearest fortress of box stores -- Wal-Mart, groceries, K-Mart, etc.  Many gay people would fear that they would be alone.

Guess what?  

Straight people -- single -- or couples -- are alone -- in rural areas.

We have community.

I am on the Fire Department. A volunteer.   I am connected and feel support from other people on the Department.  They could care less that I am gay.

I am the Town Constable.  I am a Lister with the Town.  Both are elected positions.

We live on 110 acres of remote forest land.  We own a tractor, an excavator, 2 guns, 2 dogs, 2 potbellied pigs and 3 chickens (we had more but they were taken out by a fox this summer). 

We have no cable TV or Internet access -- if you want it in our town the only way to get it is through satellite.

I am a vegetarian.  My partner is not.

(He smokes cigarettes.  I go hiking -- http://hikeswithscott.com) 

We struggle -- like anyone struggles in this world today -- but we are happy.

Isn't that all we can expect out of life?

I hope you are happy.

If you are not, give me a call at 802-380-1026 and lets talk about how you can get your bearings and get going!